“You sons of bitches charged my card without checking if I ACTUALLY wanted the piece of shit service in the first place. No, I don’t want another Netflix account, I wanted to just watch fucking season 2 of Bob’s Burgers. So yes I volunteered for a free subscription with no intention of paying. I know I should have cancelled before one week was up, I get it, you have to make $8 a head somehow! Don’t worry, you’re not losing me to Netflix, I cancelled that one too. I’d rather YouTube and pirate every piece of television or film from a Japanese host site than deal with your mind-numbing advertisements and last-ditch efforts to capitalize on the web-streaming industry, efforts which I would liken to a near-death diabetic sucking insulin out of an ogre’s asshole. Kill yourselves, you shit-sucking swine.”—What I wrote in the “Other” section when asked to provide reasons for canceling my Hulu Plus account FREE TRIAL
This track here is not a song, nor a tune. It is a sound. A sound compiled by satanists in the early 12th century to open a door to hell to willingly given their souls to Lucifer. A sound used in 13th centure Europe during Excorisms to open the gates of hell in order to send the demon within someone back to its origins. This track is a danger to play for when it opens the gates of hell, it allows demons to enter wherever you are. Play at your own risk!!! There are certain “safe” zone where this track will not play at all and these zones are usually holy places such as churches where demons would not dare to lurk.
Do you ever start tearing up when describing the state of your finances? Suicide might be right for you. Call the number below for more information on ways to kill yourself and die because no matter how many career advances you make it’ll never be enough because your family’s basically just trying to get rid of you because you cost them money and they’re broke too, thereby figuratively Sisyphus-ing you into a shit hole and situational depression!!!!!!!!!!! BYE!!!!!!!!!!!
I can remember it feeling like the absolute last thing on a long list of “to-dos,” but the list was on a marker board and every time I would see a girl with pretty legs I would erase it and say “awesome, I don’t have to do that now!” It would just sit there inside of me and come up to the surface as a flush to the face or a reddening of my ears when someone would hint it to me. It’s unusual how we forget the easiest facts that we knew in childhood. Breathing from your stomach is soothing, climbing trees is easier when you’re barefoot, and lying makes you feel horrible. And just as I missed the feeling of tree bark on my heels, I missed not having to worry about a lie I never elected to tell. Bargaining with myself was a constant inner dialogue. “I’ll do it in the fall, but after midterms and before finals.” Arbitrary dates, and a seemingly never ending line of obstacles and ridiculous reasons not to do it. “Well if I tell people I’m gay then that asshole from high school will be proven right!” It’s remarkable how long you can justify admiring the boy in front of you’s perfect blond hair and delicate neck as “he seems cool.” Looking back it seems like wasted time, an unnecessary atonement for not being what I was expected to be. When I finally went through with it I found myself so much more whole. All of my insecurities finally had an explanation, all of my doubts were reconciled, and I could finally be content with the fact that yes, that boy has the softest looking hands I have ever seen, and yes, I want to hold them in mine. Everyone’s story is different; the pace and intensity of our lives vary and vex, but regardless of circumstance, it is important to be satisfied with who you are and how you are. Feeling guilty for feeling is uniquely human, and uniquely tormenting. I wish everyone the power to soothe themselves by being themselves. Rescue what’s deeper, because it will change you.
Will posted this a long time ago but I think about it literally every week of my life when I find myself reflecting about everything I know and where I am.
I just think it’s beautiful and sweet and comforting and articulates things I feel and don’t know how to say.
“We were discussing homosexuality because of an allusion to it in the book we were reading, and several boys made comments such as, “That’s disgusting.” We got into the debate and eventually a boy admitted that he was terrified/disgusted when he was once sharing a taxi and the other male passenger made a pass at him.The lightbulb went off. “Oh,” I said. “I get it. See, you are afraid, because for the first time in your life you have found yourself a victim of unwanted sexual advances by someone who has the physical ability to use force against you.” The boy nodded and shuddered visibly.“But,” I continued. “As a woman, you learn to live with that from the time you are fourteen, and it never stops. We live with that fear every day of our lives. Every man walking through the parking garage the same time you are is either just a harmless stranger or a potential rapist. Every time.” The girls in the room nodded, agreeing. The boys seemed genuinely shocked. “So think about that the next time you hit on a girl. Maybe, like you in the taxi, she doesn’t actually want you to.”—